IELTS Writing Section: Task 2 Parte 1

\- **DISTANCE-LEARNING PROGRAMS** \- I disagree with the various **critics who claim** that distance-learning programs lack the **quality needed to learn** new skills. Today, I would like to share my **perspective on** this topic because there are numerous advantages to **continuing** online learning. \- Firstly, I don’t understand why people **have to experience the stress** of traveling to **distant** institutes or universities when it is perfectly possible **to learn so many** courses online, often at a **lower cost** than attending in person. Also, online information **tends to be more up-to-date than books**, and you can learn in **shorter** periods of time. **In fact, technology makes classes more interactive** as students can use educational software and **advanced** tools like ChatGPT to **accelerate their understanding** of new topics. \- Secondly, the stress of **commuting** in heavily trafficked cities like Lima **makes it difficult to stay focused** when you finally arrive at university or an institute. Nobody **wants to waste** time in an **overcrowded bus** for hours, spending money on tickets or taxis. **This is why** online education is an **excellent alternative to** develop skills **from the comfort** of your own home. In other words, **your success as a student depends on your own motivation to learn, and it is even more difficult when you are tired or frustrated after a long commute** to an educational institution. \- In conclusion, there are many advantages to becoming more familiar with online education. **It allows you to continue learning even while traveling, stay updated, spend less money than on in-person courses, and obtain your degrees more quickly.** \- **Explicaciones de los cambios a nivel C2:** 1\. **Clarificación y Precisión en el Planteamiento de la Tesis:** o **Original:** "I disagree with the different critics who refers that distance-learning programs do not have enough quality to learn new skills." o **Corregido:** "I disagree with the various **critics who claim** that distance-learning programs lack the **quality needed to learn** new skills." o **Explicación:** A nivel avanzado, es importante la precisión. "Different critics who refers" es incorrecto en número y estructura; debe ser "various critics who claim." "Enough quality to learn new skills" fue cambiado a "quality needed to learn" para una expresión más clara y formal. 2\. **Eliminación de Redundancia y Mejor Fluidez:** o **Original:** "I would like to share with you my points this respect..." o **Corregido:** "I would like to share my **perspective on** this topic..." o **Explicación:** "With you" es redundante en un texto escrito; "my perspective on this topic" es más directo y formal, necesario en un nivel avanzado de escritura. 3\. **Corrección de Gramática y Concordancia:** o **Original:** "I hate why the people must being stressful going to far away institutes..." o **Corregido:** "I don’t understand why people **have to experience the stress** of traveling to **distant** institutes..." o **Explicación:** "I hate why the people must being stressful" tiene múltiples errores gramaticales. En C2, se busca precisión, por lo que se cambia a "I don’t understand why people have to experience the stress." "Distant" es la palabra correcta para describir "far away institutes." 4\. **Corrección de Errores en Léxico y Uso de Adjetivos:** o **Original:** "it is perfectly possible learn so mane curses online and even cheapest than take them in person." o **Corregido:** "it is perfectly possible **to learn so many** courses online, often at a **lower cost** than attending in person." o **Explicación:** Se cambió "mane curses" a "many courses" y "even cheapest" a "at a lower cost," usando la estructura correcta de adjetivo comparativo. 5\. **Actualización y Precisión en Referencias Tecnológicas:** o **Original:** "the information online tents to be more actualize than book, and you can learn in short periods of time." o **Corregido:** "online information **tends to be more up-to-date than books**, and you can learn in **shorter** periods of time." o **Explicación:** "Tents" es incorrecto y se cambió a "tends." "More actualize" no es apropiado; se cambió a "more up-to-date" para mayor precisión. 6\. **Claridad y Uso Preciso de Ejemplos:** o **Original:** "I mean, the advantages of technology help to set the classes more interactive because the students can use educational software and advantages tools like chat GPT..." o **Corregido:** "**In fact, technology makes classes more interactive** as students can use educational software and **advanced** tools like ChatGPT..." o **Explicación:** "I mean" es informal y redundante en textos formales. Se cambió a "In fact." "Advantages tools" se cambió a "advanced tools," pues este término describe mejor la funcionalidad de herramientas como ChatGPT. 7\. **Corrección de Expresiones Complejas y Errores Léxicos:** o **Original:** "the stress of transportation in heavy traffic cities like Lima contributes to lost the focus when you get to university or institute." o **Corregido:** "the stress of **commuting** in heavily trafficked cities like Lima **makes it difficult to stay focused** when you finally arrive at university or an institute." o **Explicación:** "Transportation" fue cambiado a "commuting," que es el término adecuado. "Contributes to lost the focus" es incorrecto y se corrigió a "makes it difficult to stay focused," una frase más precisa y adecuada a un nivel avanzado. 8\. **Clarificación de Puntos Clave en los Beneficios del Aprendizaje en Línea:** o **Original:** "Well, that is another advantage to use the new online education as an alternative for develop your skills with the most distressful commodities of your own home." o **Corregido:** "**This is why** online education is an **excellent alternative to** develop skills **from the comfort** of your own home." o **Explicación:** "Well" es informal y no adecuado para este registro. "Distressful commodities" es incorrecto, y se cambió a "comfort" para expresar la idea de forma correcta y sofisticada. 9\. **Conclusión Clara y Concisa:** o **Original:** "In conclusion, there are many advantages to being more familiar with on-line education. Because you can continue learning even traveling, being more actualized, invest less sums of money than taking in person courses get your degrees in more faster way." o **Corregido:** "In conclusion, there are many advantages to becoming more familiar with online education. **It allows you to continue learning even while traveling, stay updated, spend less money than on in-person courses, and obtain your degrees more quickly.**" o **Explicación:** La conclusión original era confusa y tenía errores en gramática y léxico. En un nivel C2, la claridad y concisión son claves, por lo que se reescribió para expresar cada beneficio de manera clara y directa.

Extreme sports like snowboarding or motorsports have been in the center of the public eye for a long time now due to concerns about their safety towards the athletes. These concerns are completely valid, but if they are taken into account too seriously, it could mean the end of some sports. In my opinion, these risky sports should not be banned, however the security of the participants must be, to an adequate extent, one of the top priorities of both organizations and regulators.

Recently there have been a lot of discussions about studies and whether distance- learning programs could be as good as studies in person or not. In my opinion, I think that people learn better by being present than virtually.