Jokes to practice

We can practice some vocabulary and some grammar rules with these jokes. We can even practice some w questions … and maybe we can also laugh a little.

Teacher: Leah, what is the chemical formula for water?
Leah: H I J K L M N O.
Teacher: What are you talking about?
Leah: Yesterday you said it’s H to O.

John: What is a fish without an eye?
Tom: A fsh!

Why are two times ten the same as two times eleven? Because two times ten is twenty, and two times eleven is twenty, too!

– “I was born in California.”
– “Which part?”
– “All of me.”

Will you remember me in an hour?
Yes.
Will you remember me in a day?
Yes.
Will you remember me in a week?
Yes.
Will you remember me in a month?
Yes.
Will you remember me in a year?
Yes.
I think you won’t.
Yes, I will.
Knock, knock!
Who’s there?
See? You’ve forgotten me already!

A man is talking to God.
The man: “God, how long is a million years?”
God: “To me, it’s about a minute.”
The man: “God, how much is a million dollars?”
God: “To me, it’s a penny.”
The man: “God, may I have a penny?”
God: “Wait a minute.”